I’m having the best week I’ve had in months! I got a new job and will be moving again. Mentally, I’m in a place where I’m genuinely happy and fulfilled. I listened to the most recent podcast from Maronzio Vance. It prompted me to sit down with the book of J. The subplot into the next chapter of my life actually started on the tail end of a hellish year, so let me back track a bit to give some context…
2011 brought about some painful losses. My father passed away in June from metastatic pancreatic cancer. In August, I had a heart attack that nearly killed me. Then in November, my sister passed away unexpectedly. And the icing on the cake was having my knee finally give out. I spent the Christmas weekend in VA getting a complete ACL reconstruction. Through it all, I kept trying to tell myself it gets better. Then I lost my job and decided to move to Atlanta.
Losing my job was a pivotal point in my life, both professionally and personally. It thrust me down a rabbit hole blindly. For a few months, I just cowered in the dark; scared, anxious, and angry. I was angry at myself for not analyzing my move from every imaginable angle. But more important, I was scared that I wasn’t going to be able to get out. I had always had my dad there to consult. When I found myself stuck on stupid, Pops talked me through the best decision I could make, given all the facts. It’s almost like he’d done all the critical thinking my entire life. Then all of a sudden, he left me out to dry. Or at least that’s how I took it.
Out of loss comes great wisdom. I’ve taken every single loss I’ve experienced over the past year and turned it into a lesson of perseverance and in patience. But when I really sat back and thought about why I’d fallen down the rabbit hole to begin with, it hit me like a wrecking ball. There was a time in my life where money ruled every decision I made. If it didn’t align with my financial vision, it didn’t make sense to pursue it. I had become a slave to money and it had discarded me like a $2 bill. Now, the joke was on me. I kinda felt like King Solomon without all the h0s.
After I listened to Maronzio’s podcast, I was hype to start a new chapter in the book of J. It’s almost like he was talking directly to me. I don’t read self-help books, but I do know that when you want to get to a finite point in your life, you need to visualize your plan of action. A lot of things will help you on the path to a life fulfilled, as you define it. But money should not be 1 of them. Money can be a great motivator but it can also be a debilitating crutch. Think of how many opportunities you’ve missed out on because the money wasn’t right or wasn’t enough. I allowed old white men on a piece of paper dictate the progress and speed at which my life would move. No one thing should have that much power over you.
Every day is a blank page in your life’s story. Fear of failure and lack of resources should not be the reasons why your story remains unfinished. You’re always going to have conflicts and deterrents that will try to keep you from pressing forward. But you have to write something right?